2023: Leaning Into The Shift
The flip of the calendar as the Earth starts another orbit around the Sun can be met with a wide variety of reactions by people.
Some people fastidiously plan out all their goals and resolutions for the year.
Some feel newly energized and motivated as they dart out the door to the gym to lose that holiday weight, or swirl around the house like a Tasmanian Devil trying to declutter and organize their life.
Others feel so exhausted from the previous year or the holidays that they’re just so freaking glad it’s over.
And others, just don’t give a crap . . . it feels like the same shit, different day or year.
Whatever way you’re feeling about 2023, please know that you have full permission to feel that way and to honor exactly where you are.
And . . . if and when you’re feeling up for it, can I offer a slightly different perspective on welcoming in the New Year . . .
one that’s based on my recent experience in 2022?
And the perspective is this: lean into anything that feels like it wants to shift.
What the hell does that mean?
It means that given what you’ve experienced the last few years, I’m guessing that you’ve felt a little something stirring inside you.
Maybe it started before the pandemic . . . maybe it was later.
Maybe you noticed that you started feeling a bit more:
burnt out
distracted
angsty
anxious
lacking in motivation
bored
frustrated
stifled
trapped
lonely
depressed
lost
disoriented
disillusioned
That’s a lot of “feels,” right? And there are probably a lot of folks having some or all of those feelings right now. That makes a ton of sense given what everyone has been going through the last few years.
Well, in my experience, those stirrings are signs . . .
signs that something within you or within your world wants to shift.
And by “shift,” I mean "to give way” or to “move into something else.”
I think of “shift” like literally shifting gears on a manual transmission, a.k.a., a stick shift. (For those of you who’ve never driven a stick, you don’t know what you’re missing).
When you drive a stick, you gradually let up on the clutch from the stopped position, give it some gas, and let the first gear propel the car forward. Then, as you increase your speed, you hear the engine start to rev and the RPMs go up. At around 3,000 RPMs, you shift into second gear, and so on and so on, until you get up to the car’s highest gear and you can just keep cruising down the highway.
Conversely, when you’re slowing down, you gradually downshift to slow the car down.
When you’re driving a stick, two things are true:
You have to tune into when the car needs to shift, otherwise you’ll likely screw up your engine; and
You never want to shift up more than one gear at a time . . . otherwise, you may be walking back down the road to pick up your transmission. Instead, you shift up gradually, one gear at a time, tuning into when the engine needs to shift.
So, back to your stirrings . . . these stirrings that you may be feeling are like the sounds an engine makes as you’re cruising along to tell you that you need to shift gears.
If you don’t listen, you’re going to keep revving your engine in the same gear, trying to cruise down the highway, until you ultimately burn up your engine . . .
and by “engine", I actually mean you - you will burn up (figuratively speaking).
So, when I offer the new perspective to lean into the shift in 2023, I mean to listen to those stirrings . . .
trust that they are signs that something in your life or in you wants - in fact needs - to shift.
Just a tiny shift - up or down one gear.
And here’s why I’m inviting you to lean into the shift . . .
In May of 2022, I started noticing some stirrings inside me. I started feeling like something was off in how I was running my business.
Something started to seem “off” about what I was focusing on and the audience I was trying to work with (lawyers and the legal profession).
I noticed the stirrings: the burn out, distraction, lack of motivation, boredom, frustration.
At first, I didn’t want to acknowledge that these stirrings were calling to me to make a shift. I thought I was just going through a rough patch. I thought I needed to just power through, figure it out, work harder, stop complaining. (Sound familiar?)
And then I remembered: I’ve heard similar stirrings before. And I ignored them . . . for eight years . . . until gradually, my engine and transmission wore out. That's when I finally decided that I needed to stop being a lawyer.
Now, a little more than two years into my business and less than a year since I’d quit my lawyer job, those stirrings were back.
So this time, when similar stirrings came up in May 2022, I listened. I paid attention to the sounds of my engine that were telling me to shift.
But shift to what?
I had no idea . . . and that was terrifying. Yet I knew from my past experience that I needed to lean into the shift. And in this case, it was a big downshift. In fact, I put the car in park and turned the engine completely off.
That’s right . . . for most of 2022, I parked my shiny new business.
It really felt like parking a car in the middle of the Mojave Desert and getting out to wander around aimlessly, without any Plan B, compass, or direction.
But, that’s what I did. And I leaned into that big time.
I traveled . . . a lot! I listened. Meditated. Cried. Got angry.
I had little to no income for almost eight months and it . . . was . . . terrifying.
But, I was patient. I trusted. I allowed myself to be exactly where I was.
And gradually, I not only found my way back to my car, but I was able to find the key, turn on the ignition, push in the clutch, give it some gas, and ease into first gear.
Sparks of insight started to emerge. And I was able to start moving down the road again, one gear at a time.
Because I leaned into the shift, I now knew what wanted to emerge.
A shift in the business . . . a new focus . . . away from working exclusively with lawyers and the legal profession.
The shift I was being invited to lean into was completely different, and yet, completely familiar.
I’m now shifting my focus to working with lawyers who are 40-50 years old - in what is known as Generation X. What I’ve noticed is that GenX lawyers have reached a point in their life and career where they feel lost, trapped, and disillusioned because they’ve followed external directions and expectations all their lives, instead of following their own internal compass. I’m going to guide those GenX lawyers in finding their internal compass so that they can live the life of freedom, flexibility, and balance that they’ve longed for.
This is a shift back to what I really know . . . what feels like familiar territory. I’m a successful, former lawyer, and Gen X’er, and I hit that point in my mid-40’s where I felt lost, trapped, and disillusioned. I was a latch-key kid from the “forgotten generation” of folks born between 1965-1980. We’re the free-thinking, laid-back generation who have a confusing cocktail of expectations of productivity, desires to be more free, and an independent streak that can often work against us. We’re the ones who watched their parents (the Baby Boomer generation) work their butts off. So we became determined to have more work/life balance, and yet, have fallen into the trap of trying to meet the expectations of our Boomer parents and society. And now, the GenX lawyers who have done what we were “supposed to do” all of our lives, have gotten to the point where we’re in the worst shape for retirement than any generation, and so many of us find ourselves caring for both our aging parents and our growing children.
My shift was calling me back to working with the generation of people whom I know best (which still includes lawyers).
Had I not been willing to listen to my stirrings - to the sounds of my engine revving - I would have never leaned into that shift.
And it’s this shift that has allowed me to feel like I’m ready to cruise on down the highway.
That’s what I mean about leaning into the shift. The shift can be small or big, and it can mean so many things, from a slight shift in perspective, to a shift in your job, to a shift in your morning routine.
Remember, the shift isn’t about going from first gear to fifth gear. It’s about tuning into the rev of the engine - those stirrings - and making one small shift at a time so that the engine runs smooth, and you can cruise on down the highway.
So, for 2023, may you be invited to listen to what’s stirring inside you . . .
to the sounds of your revving engine . . .
and allow yourself to lean into the shift.
Let me know in the comments below what shift you may want to lean into in 2023.
P.S.: for a helpful shift in perspective on planning your 2023, try Life From The Summit’s 2023 Summit Year Planning spreadsheet. Trust me - it’s a fun new way to bring more feeling and intention to your year.